Ciao from Firenze! Ok, admittedly, I wanted to write this reflection during the time of my birthday as a commemoration of things I’ve learned and how I’ve grown over the past year. One could say I’m just a little bit off schedule (my birthday was in May). However, if there’s something I’ve learned about Italian culture it’s that lateness is…subjective.
I’ve started to embrace Italian Standard Time which pretty much means that, as long as you show up at some point, you’re not late. In this case, as long as my reflection is written at some point, technically it’s not late, right?
All jokes aside, I’ve been reflecting on the many changes over the past year. There are many obvious changes like moving out of the country (twice), learning an entirely new culture and language, meeting new people and worldviews, in addition to navigating the loss of a parent and learning to manage symptoms of C-PTSD.
What isn’t so apparent are the inner shifts that have taken place. Despite the massive external changes I have undergone, I believe the changes that have surpassed crossing the ocean are the shifts that have taken place within me.
For the first time in my life, I truly belong to myself.
I didn’t even know this was what I had been searching for all along, until I felt it inside. A feeling of wholeness. It felt like a sacred return to a place I didn’t know existed. Yet, at the same time, it felt strangely familiar. I came to this unveiling truth: We do not heal because we are broken. We heal because we have forgotten that we are already whole.
Wholeness isn’t earned.
Wholeness isn’t something we become.
Wholeness cannot be taken away.
Wholeness is remembered.
It is reclaimed.
It is a sacred return.
A return to love. A return to presence. A return to the aliveness that is within each one of us.
I realized that healing isn’t something we obtain; it’s not a landing spot in the distant future. No, it is right here. It is a state of presence. It is the practice of embodiment. It’s integrating ourselves with the divinity within. This is what it means to return to our natural state of wholeness.
What is embodiment?
The tingling energy in your fingertips; the rhythmic cadence of your heartbeat; the ever-continuous flow of your breath. All of these inner workings reveal a much deeper truth: the incredible miracle it is to be alive. This is the felt sense of embodiment. It’s a universal connectedness, one in which we belong to ourselves yet also, to something much greater. This truth makes ordinary simplicities magical and sacred.
Below I will share 2 of my favorite embodiment practices: one for connecting with the earth body, and one for connecting with the “subtle body”, our energetic field.
Earth Body - Connecting with the physical
Embodiment practice #1
Finding Ground: I personally love practicing this exercise seated beneath a tree. I like to imagine I am taking root into the earth below me, while connecting to the stability and energy of the trees.
(Please note the following exercise is modified from the book “The Wakeful Body” by Willa Blythe Baker). Read through the directions first, then do the practice.
Come into a comfortable position, either seated or lying down. Notice the feeling of your body connected to the surface below you. Allow each exhale to invite more ease and relaxation into your body. Inhale ease, exhale ease. Soften. Eyelids are heavy. Jaw, neck, shoulders relaxed. Arms heavy by your side, or resting atop your legs. Feel them getting heavier as you lengthen your exhales. Feel your hips and legs sinking deeper into the ground, as though they are melting into the earth. Complete relaxation of your muscles.
In this state of complete relaxation, can you sense gravity’s pull, not as an idea but as a feeling? Can you feel your body’s natural groundedness and stability? Let all of your attention rest here.
When your mind becomes restless or wanders into thought, let your body’s groundedness draw your mind back, like a magnet. Notice how your body teaches your mind to be stable and still. You might say the body is capable of exerting its own gravitational pull on the mind. Spend 5 minutes in this practice. Take note of how you feel afterward.
Subtle Body: Awakening to the natural vibration of aliveness.
Embodiment practice #2:
Awakening aliveness: This practice can be done anywhere, but I recommend a place where you can connect to nature sounds: by a river, near trees, or another preferred space. Same as above, read through the directions first, then do the practice.
Find a comfortable position. Take a moment to notice your surroundings. Breathe in the aliveness of the world around you. What do you notice? What colors do you see? Now, close your eyes. With your eyes closed, use your senses to “take in” your environment: what do you hear? what is the temperature of the air on your skin? do you sense movement near or far? are there any smells? Allow this internal field of awareness to draw you in to the present moment.
Now rub your hands together vigorously for 10-15 seconds. Feel the heat build in your hands as you stir up this energy inside. After 15 seconds or so, bring your hands together in a prayer position in front of your chest and feel the pulsing vibration within your hands and fingertips. Feel this aliveness.
Stay here until you feel the temperature and pulse in your hands return to their natural state. Then place your hands on top of your legs, palms up or down, however you like. Can you still feel and sense that tingling aliveness in your fingers? Stay here as long as you like.
Open your eyes when you feel ready. Throughout the day, notice if you can sense this tingling sensation in your fingertips. May this remind you of the sacred aliveness within you.
As you continue to practice, you will likely find other ways that you naturally experience embodiment throughout your day as well. On my daily walking commute, I pass by a small field. Each time I see it, I am drawn in to presence and aliveness as I watch the beautiful flow of swaying trees. Each time, this deepens my breath and it feels like coming back home. Nature has a vibratory aliveness that awakens us. An invitation to return.
Wholeness and belonging are never far away. In the deepest parts of our being, wholeness simply awaits us. Each time we return to love, to presence, to the miracle of our aliveness, we return to wholeness. Still, unmoveable, ever abiding.
May you explore the depth of aliveness.
May you belong to yourself.
May you discover, dear one, that you have always been whole.
May you remember.
The sacred return.